Monday, 28 August 2017

He Says, I Will.

In my life as of late, I've seen character traits in myself that sadden my heart.  Traits that if I do not work on now, will affect my future.  There was one day (many actually, but this one in particular) where I couldn't lift my eyes up to see past the present, and what beauty would come out of the trials that I am currently experiencing.  
My wonderful Mother saw the way I was fighting, struggling to stay on top and in control of the situation.  She gave me this analogy.  
"Shayla, look at your life as a garden.  There are lots of beautiful flowers and fruits in your garden.  But along with the beauty, there are some weeds.  Right now, together we are working on pulling out some weeds.  But we're not going to just chop them off at the soil, we're going to pull out the roots too.  Because when you're old enough and ready, when Dad and I send you off, we want to send you as weed free as possible."  That clicked for me.
 I still, however, felt overwhelmed at these problems that I needed to deal with.  At a place where I questioned if I would make it through the valley to see the light of another day.

I've heard this song before, but never really listened to the lyrics before.  When I stopped to really listen to catch what the song was saying, it seemed as if God was saying, "Shayla. I'm here, I love you, and you're not alone.  I have always been here with you, and I will always be."

God used the song, I Will by Citizen Way, to tell me, that He's got me.  He will carry me.  No matter how I feel about the situation.

When the shadow won't leave
When the battle won't stop
And every breath that you breathe
Takes all that you got
When you wonder if you're always
Gonna feel this way
Hear the Lord of Heaven say

I will hold you when you're breaking
Like a Father and a Friend
And I will carry you through the darkness
'Til we see the sun again
So rest your head and cry your tears
Know that I am with you here
When you can't lift that weight
Believe me when I say, I will.

I know you're feeling overwhelmed
Before the day even begins
But I can see beyond the now
This is not how your story ends
And when you're at your weakest
Oh I've never been more strong
So let me be the one you're leaning on

I will dry your tears
I will calm your fears
I will show you how you're beautiful, beautiful
I will walk with you
On the raging sea
And I will never leave

When there's a door that you can't open
When there's a war you can't win
I will.  I will.  I will.

I'm not perfect.  I still stumble.  But I know that when I do, He says "I will."


Christiana said...

That's a beautiful testimony Shayla. I will be praying for you. Thanks for the encouragement!

Kerri Pauls said...

Shayla, I love you, and I love this post! You are growing into such an amazing young woman, and every hard day is gonna be worth it! Keep writing cause I love you blog posts!

Jennifer Pauls said...

Shay Shay. You are a beautiful person. I love you, and I love your heart. You've got this girl, you will make it through, and you are not alone. ❤️